so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
