chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
