Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Randomize
