i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
