real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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