Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Randomize
