I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
