Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
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Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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