What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
Randomize