Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
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