She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
