i was born a porn star she said
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
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