on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
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