I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Randomize
