Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
I understand Curling. That high.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
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