he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
i used baking grease as lip gloss
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
