I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize
