I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Randomize
