Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Randomize