Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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