Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
