I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Randomize
