Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Dick very happy bro
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
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