Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
