Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Randomize
