I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Midget sex pt 2 tonight
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize