i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
