he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
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