I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
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