Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
