We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
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