i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
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