Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
This baby is an asshole
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
