I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
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