The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
Randomize
