i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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