Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize