its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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