If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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