quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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