My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
