yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
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