yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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