There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
My brain says no but my pants say off.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
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