I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
The cops high fived after they tackled you
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
