we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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