dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
