Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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