I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Randomize
