How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
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