38 yer olds are good kisserssss
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Randomize
